Buy me some peanuts and cracker jacks

Baseball is the theme of the hour, as Chicago’s cherished Sammy Sosa is caught using a corked bat. I should mention that I don’t really follow baseball, or any professional sport, but I have several friends who are crazy go nuts for the pastime (and more friends without weblogs).

So, they showed lots of footage on TV of Sammy spashing water on his face while the umpires inspected the shattered bat. The look on his face said, “I’m so fucked.” Yeah, dude, I saw the cops they had guarding the evidence. Don’t even try crawling through the air ducts.

And though you probably won’t be seeing Sammy, you can get tickets on eBay for Saturday’s game when the Yankees play the Cubs. Maybe Roger Clemens will win his 300th game. But the tickets will cost you upwards of $500.

Speaking of money, I wonder what British capitalist journalists think of Major League Baseball. Oh, they think it’s unAmerican.

Breaking my streak of two deft segues, it appears that all 68 MLB umpires are male. I’d be willing to be none of them are openly homosexual. That is to say, many sports have a ways to go towards achieving equality. Related: Evelyn confirms that Bill O’Reilly is not received with zesty jolliness.

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